Monday, December 13, 2010

Where, oh where, did my little blog go?

I was never a daily "post-er."
But I would get in here...two, three times a week. My mind was often on my blog: What will I write next? Oooh, that will be a good one! I've got to get that one done tonight.
Lately, I have nearly abandoned it.
It's not that I don't have material. It's not that I don't want to write.
In fact, I post almost everyday...in my own head.
I "write" posts in the shower, on my runs, on my drive to work, while I'm loading the dishwasher. They are usually incredibly spot-on, full of insight, poignancy, wit, and honesty.
But...they rarely make it online anymore. They only exist in my head.
Here's the thing: when I can finally get to that post, that idea that has been born inside my head, that fleeting moment of inspiration is gone. Poof. It went down the tub with the boys' bath water, or it fell out of my head as I stretched post-run, or, more often than not, it just doesn't seem that important later on.
The truth is that most nights, there's a full-out fight: at 9:00, after I've been up since 5:00 a.m., after I've spent the day teaching 53 fourth-graders, after I've helped Ben with his Letter Of The Week Homework, after I've packed my gym bag for the next day, and searched for "just one more" thing in the latest I Spy book, it comes down to..."Do I blog or do I sleep?" And, as evidenced by my recent absence, sleep usually wins.
It's just easier to snuggle under the covers (especially on these frigid South Florida nights of 50 degree weather...what can I say?...I'm a true beach bum) with a book and dim lighting...or curl up on the sofa as Hubby watches the Heat game and rubs my feet...or literally just crash and be sound asleep by 9:01.
Perhaps this is all proof that I never really was meant to be a "real writer." I mean, a writer should have the constant need to write, right? A writer must actually write...Monday through Friday...a real job. It seems that as my blog now nears its 2nd anniversary, the drive in me is slightly lessened: "It's okay...I'll write that one tomorrow." But lately, it turns into tomorrow, and my bed or my sofa beckons yet again.
Sweet dreams.

8 comments:

  1. Seems like the majority of my posts are written in my head too! And by 9:00 pm? forget it - my brain is mush and I have to go to bed because I'm usually so tired by then I can't even remember my own name.

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  2. Hey, at least you pack that gym bag and get in a workout every day. That's serious motivation, especially with a 5 a.m. wake-up call. Can you send me some of that?? =>

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  3. Dude you're a true writer. You're just tired. It happens. Every author out there has periods where they just aren't feeling it and so writing takes a back seat to the rest of life. And this is definitely the time of year where we all want to hibernate.

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  4. I think it happens to everyone, and you just have to give yourself permission to take a break. We love you and will be here when you are able to breathe and write again.

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  5. I'm in exactly the same place a the moment - I have the inspiration but not the time or the energy to devote to anything else.

    I'm hoping I get my blogging mojo back in the New Year (and that I get some more sleep over the holiday period)

    Have a break, recharge the batteries and come back when you fancy it again - we'll still be here

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  6. I've heard that too: that a writer needs to write. And I've heard about great novelists and poets who write every lunch break and every minute of every weekend. And that's great for them. But I always wonder: what about their spouse? What about their kids? What about the demands of their job that spill over into those times?

    You are a writer, lady. You're also a wife and a mom and a teacher. And you'll find your equivalent of the "lunch break" or "weekend" again. I know it. And I'll be here to read when you do.

    xo

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  7. You are a writer. You're just tired. I have a million posts in my head as well, but it's hard for everyone to get the time to actually post them in 'real life.'

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  8. Yep, I'll take your dedication to your health over finding time to write any day of the week. Write when you get the urge, but don't feel compelled to slap a label on any of it.

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