You are ten

I remember

that quiet solitary moment in the hospital

when everyone had left

I was left

with you

in my arms

your eyes were open

you were looking at me

and I didn't really understand

but I knew there was one thing

I could tell you

for sure:

that you were a lucky baby

that you had the coolest father

the best dad

of that

only

I was sure

you had this smell

I still remember it

I have no idea what it was

why you had it

but your brother never did

and I have never smelled it since

it was not baby cologne

or baby powder

it was

simply

you

it smelled like being born

purity

clean

earth

this smell

we still talk about it

remember it

your daddy and I

it has been ten years

ten

you came into our lives

some crazy psychic once said

you were a special soul

you drive us crazy

often

and

intensely

but there is

this special bond

an awareness

that there is something

different

about

you

you

single-handedly

changed me, him

us

one decade

The baby

the one who had waited

to come when it was time

the only one who could have

filled the space

that we were not sure

even needed

filling

and I am still

not sure

we could even come close

to being worthy

of being chosen

by you