It is no secret that we have made a major life change recently. (In fact, I suspect my loved ones and my blog readers are quite sick of hearing me complain about closings, boxes, and remodeling.) Most people think this was "very sudden" and spontaneous. But this general unease about the house we were living in (and the mortgage we were paying) had been gnawing at me for a few years now. In fact, here's evidence.
Exchange
This poem was originally posted here on September 2, 2011
we had always had a plan
so sure of what we wanted
to live life, together, out loud
be as free as commitment allowed
untethered to the things Everyone Else
used to measure their grand arrival
at the finish line of life
keep it small and live simply
so we could live Life large
travel, dance, laugh, sleep at night
without the stresses Everyone Else chose:
a lawn man, the corner lot
we planned life with bare feet
spontaneity, experiences, whimsy, free of cares
we were so sure back then
until something shifted, wishes got swapped
and we suddenly found ourselves dreaming
of a grown up life, settled
a home that was spacious enough
to welcome Just One More baby
(and a lawn man to cut
the grass on the corner lot)
we swapped one dream for another
found ourselves with a new life
new joys, different desires, wishes granted
but with it all sometimes comes
the subtle, quiet unease of wonder:
was this the life we intended
one we will look back on
with satisfaction of a life fulfilled
or a life exchanged for one
that is just like Everyone Else's?
And now that you've experienced the "grown up" life - you have been reminded of the life you *really* want.
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