I know. That was me. I said it. Not too long ago, actually. But there are days that are good. Yummy, even. Today was one of those. Not really sure why.
Maybe because Ben was incredibly polite. Maybe because I did not have to remind him to "be nice" even once. Maybe because he sat in the barber chair at the new hair salon today and did not move an inch except to smile at me over his wet, giant plastic sheet and make funny faces when I pointed to the can of lollipops sitting behind me.
Maybe because Aidan Kai is almost a year old. Maybe because he laughed so hard when I tickled him on the couch that I thought if I looked up "belly laugh" in the dictionary, his picture would be there. Maybe it was because of the picture I took of him on the beach...wearing the exact same Hawaiian shell necklace and swimming trunks his big brother did nearly 4 years ago for his first birthday photo. Maybe it was because, even though everyone said "Aidan will never stay still long enough for that picture!", he did...for that one and about a million more. And maybe it was because I knew he would.
Maybe it was because we bought our last can of formula EVER.
Maybe it was because everyone went to sleep easily and quietly and sweetly tonight...Aidan Kai all scrunched up with his little rag and butt in the air and Mickey Mouse socks, Ben with his cars and airplanes parked on the edge of the bed, his rag next to him on his pillow.
Today was no different than most days. Yes, we managed to get through all meals with no milk spills, but there were still Moments. Tough ones. Tiresome ones. The dishwasher is still sitting open, waiting to be unloaded and reloaded yet again. The clean clothes are still sitting, waiting and wrinkling in the dryer. But just like there are days when I feel like I simply can not do this for one more moment, there are days that I feel like my life has somehow, finally, fallen into a rhythmic and predictable pattern of chaos. And I love it.